Parenting: “Doing it right”


The carseat also works for naps.

I’ve recently found a new determination to make sure Cody naps.  In a search for different methods, I kept hearing people say how much “Babywise” had helped their baby sleep through the night and nap.  Sounding like a great deal, I bought the book on my kindle and immediately started trying “cry it out.”  Cody cried, and I did, too.  Every time I would go in to calm him, he would look at me like, “why are you abandoning me,” and my mother heart just couldn’t take it.  Immediately, I looked up “no cry” methods and found “The No Cry Nap Solution.”  This book has helped so much in getting Cody to nap.  I simply follow his tired cues, and stay in the room with him for the allotted time it takes for him to fall asleep (usually about 15 minutes, which is how long he would have to cry before he slept, anyway).  I just take my laptop in and check facebook while he settles in and gets cozy.  

Not long after I read this article. 

Here’s the thing, though…as mothers, we feel pressure to do things certain ways.  Cry it out or no cry, baby wearing or strollers, cloth diapering or disposables, breastfeeding or formula (not to mention exclusive breastfeeding or pumping/bottles).  We could keep adding to this list all day long and not feel any better about ourselves, and there is compelling evidence for each and every side.  The whole experience I just mentioned made me realise that the best thing we can do is go with our motherly instincts and do what works for our baby.  It probably won’t have a label or be one side or the other, and that’s okay.  I was thinking all of this, and then my friend posted this article on facebook, and my heart cried out in delight at the fact that someone could put this into words in such a beautiful way (and, by the way, I totally relate to the mom-in-law story at the beginning of the article).

I feel so much more at peace knowing that I don’t have to choose a side, and no one is a bad mother for doing what works for her baby.  Lets join together and agree that every mom (mum) is doing the best she can to do the best for her child.


5 thoughts on “Parenting: “Doing it right”

  1. I wholeheartedly agree with you. Personally, I haven’t even bothered to google or read books on how to raise my son. I play it all by ear, remain flexible, and don’t care one way or the other what others think. I do tend to ask other mothers I meet how they handled different situations, but mainly for ideas on what I could do or what I want to avoid. One huge issue I am getting tired of is vaccinations. People I don’t even know give me very opinionated, unwanted chats on not vaccinating my child. I have my own research to do and don’t need extremists butting in on a personal decision! Ugh. I just wish everyone could mind their own business and worry about their own lol.

  2. Agreed! I read a ton of books because I felt like I needed some guidance, or at least a starting point for ideas at times. But I think Im basically an eclectic mix of parenting books and taken what I like from each and don’t use what I don’t like! And every baby is different…

    • I’m with you. I’ve enjoyed reading quite a few different books, but have fallen somewhere in a balanced middle with them all (I think, anyway). And, yes, each baby will need different things, even within one family.

  3. Totally agree! This is pretty much what I was thinking with one of my recent posts. I find the “books” so frustrating because there is ALWAYS something I don’t like in each one. Take the best, leave the rest, I guess. 🙂

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